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  • Your fellow Superwoman

Surviving Our Anniversary Without A Babysitter

This past Sunday the 19th of May, was my husband and I 2-year marriage anniversary. (I call it marriage and not wedding because we don't really consider our ceremony a wedding. We did a small courthouse ceremony and dinner reception with close family and friends immediately after. In our opinion a wedding is something at a much larger scale and is something we hope to someday be able to do in the future.) Approaching this special date, we talked about what we should do and we both agreed to do all that we could to spend the entire day together celebrating. It's been a long time since we've even gone on a date alone, (unless you want to count trips to the supermarket and running errands) that we were super excited about being alone just the two of us for this one special day.

We decided it would be a good idea to do something that would be relaxing and stress relieving. We've had so much going on just one thing after the other. We are both so over due for some mental, emotional, and physical rehabilitation and renewal. I asked around and many people recommended we try out "Sojo Spa" in New Jersey. From looking at their website, I could already feel a sense of relaxation and total stress relief. I asked my daughter's godmother if she would be available to babysit for the entire day and she agreed to be available for us. The plan was to go to the spa at around 10 am. We would spend the entire day enjoying their many spa facilities and get a couple’s massage. Later, we were planning on finding an interesting restaurant we wanted to try out for dinner.

Sadly, my daughter's godmother had a tragic death in her immediate family from her father's side just a few days before our anniversary date. We were left with the difficult task of finding another babysitter within the next 3 days. Unfortunately for us, since our search was so last minute, everyone we asked could not commit to staying with her, not that we had many options anyway. You see, my husband and I are extremely strict about who watches our daughter. Whoever we decide to leave her with is definitely someone whom we trust wholeheartedly and that we would never have any doubts in our minds about. On top of that, we always prefer the person comes to our home instead of dropping her off somewhere she is not comfortable or familiar with. Leaving us with really just a few options (3-4 persons).

I had given up all hopes and really had no idea what to expect for our anniversary date. However, my mood completely changed after my husband came to speak to me the day before. He turned our ruined anniversary day plans into a wonderful day that we can spend as a family. In that moment, listening to his perspective, made me even more grateful and happy to be his wife. He told me that it was okay that we brought our daughter along with us on our date because it is important to show her how much we love and cherish each other. To him it was important to share with her our special day because in a way she was a part of it too. Almost immediately, my idea of this anniversary completely changed. It went from a day to celebrate the love of my husband and I and all that we have done for each other over the years to a day to value the family we have built together.

As far as how our day went, it wasn't too bad. I told my husband I was okay with doing anything as long as we started our day with attending mass together. Like the good husband that he is, he complied and pleased me by taking us all to church. (As I've stated before, my husband isn't very fond of attending mass, which is why my daughter and I usually go alone.) The mass was perfect for the occasion! It was as if the priest was literally talking to us. At the end of each mass, the priest usually calls up any couples that are celebrating an anniversary to give them his blessings. It was really nice to have the opportunity to have that special blessing by a priest I highly admire and who has recently influenced my life. On the downside, my daughter was not too happy about being in church. She constantly pointed at the door and said to me, "Mama, go!" As soon as she said that, she expected for me to get up and leave. When she noticed I wasn't moving towards the exit, she would have a mini tantrum and start yelling. She never acted so cranky at mass like she did that day. Thankfully, when she started acting up there was only a few minutes left of the mass and we were able to make it to the very end.

After mass, my husband had planned for us to have dinner at "Peter's Clam Bar" in Island Park, Long Island. Neither of us had ever been there but we heard great things about their food. We chose to sit outside on the deck by the water. It was a little windy for me and my daughter, but we thought it would be nice to eat and get some fresh air. I have to say, the service was not so great. To start, it took about 15-20 minutes for someone to come over to our table to greet us and take our drink orders. We had to request a high chair because they did not give us one when they sat us at our table. After going through the trouble of getting the high chair, my daughter refused to sit in it. She wanted to sit on the regular adult chair next to me and if we didn't comply with her demand she would have another tantrum. (This is something she is now doing often, the not wanting to sit in a high chair. Anyone else going through this stage?)

I ordered a "Tango Mango Colada" and my husband ordered some fried calamari and baked clams as appetizers. The drink was great but my husband was not too satisfied with the appetizers. I can't really be a judge of calamari and clams because I don't really eat any of it. For my entree, I ordered baked swordfish with rice and vegetables. My husband got a lobster & shrimp salad. For our daughter, we ordered her chicken fingers and french fries. When it came down to the entrees, everything was absolutely delicious and well made. You could taste the freshness of the food. My daughter even had some of my swordfish and rice because it was so good. We were so stuffed that we drove straight home and skipped dessert. My daughter had already fallen into a deep sleep on the drive home. Once we arrived, my husband and I realized she was not waking up anytime soon. We decided to take full advantage of the moment and take a nap with her.

About an hour later, I woke up and everyone was still asleep. I thought it would be best to wake up my daughter to avoid her not wanting to go to bed later that night. Suddenly, I realized we had not taken a family picture the entire day! (I am a big photo hoarder. I like to take pictures of every special moment or day to look back to in the future over and over again.) By looking at the pictures below you can tell my daughter's mood only became crankier towards the end of the day. All my husband and I kept saying to each other was, out of all the days today she wanted to act like a toddler entering her terrible two's...

...Sew This is Life!

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